According to Jim

Cheryl wants Jim to give up his vices so he can get her pregnant.

Cheryl surprises Jim with a romantic evening, but it cuts into his planned TV boxing match.

Jim offers to give Andy an old barbecue grill, then decides Andy should pay for it.

Cheryl and Dana are forced to smash their way out of a locked garage, because they ignored Jim's lesson on how to open the door from the inside.

Kyle wants to be Cinderella for Halloween. Jim is against it because he thinks he's growing up to be a sissy. Jim buys Kyle a manly costume (a dinosaur) but Kyle changes back into the dress. Jim, Andy, and Kyle all sit on the couch, Jim and Kyle persistent. Jim goes in the kitchen, sees an older Kyle who convinces Jim to let Kyle go as Cinderella. In the end, they all go as ladies and they trick-or-treat.

Ruby hurts Jim's feelings when she invites Andy to a father-daughter dance instead of him.

Cheryl's mother, Maggie, wants Jim, Cheryl and the family to rest someday in a family plot she reserved years ago, but Jim insists on his own family plot--then secretly reserves a a plot for himself next to a star football player.

To prove his worth as a man, Jim -- along with Andy -- hunt a turkey for Thanksgiving, but on the hunt Jim is pursued -- and shot -- by a legendary 40- lb. psychotic bird christened "Angry Pete."

Cheryl's gynecologist forbids her from having sex with Jim until the time is right to get pregnant, and Jim eats crow in order to win a huge account from a blowhard potential client.

Jim tangles with a department store Santa after the two are involved in a parking lot fender bender. Unfortunately, Jim's kids witness the skirmish and are fearful Santa won't leave them any gifts for Christmas.

Jim befriends his obnoxious neighbors when he believes they bring good luck when he's watching the Chicago Bulls.

Jim buys a nanny-cam to spy on the sitter he didn't want Cheryl to hire but learns something about Cheryl instead, prompting her to buy a camera of her own.

To make Cheryl feel desirable, Jim fakes a jealous rage in a restaurant and tries to teach Dana's date to do the same, but the lesson backfires when Dana fears her new beau is paranoid and possessive.

Cheryl claims to like men who aren't afraid to cry, but when Jim bursts into tears after a movie, she is surprised to find herself turned off by his sensitivity.

Cheryl cooks dinner for Dana and her boyfriend and lets him believe that Dana actually did the cooking.

When Cheryl offers Dana the use of her wedding gown, Jim and Andy try to cover up the fact that the dress was destroyed in a fiery sports celebration years ago.

A hot delivery girl gives Jim some fashion advice, prompting him to grow a mustache, which Cheryl hates. Cheryl retaliates by becoming a brunette - but Jim loves it. After a chance meeting with the girl, Cheryl asks her to give Jim suggestions that will make him look ridiculous.

When Andy decides to learn how to dance for his sister's wedding, he turns to Jim, a closet dancer, for help.

In order to avoid going to an opera with Cheryl, Jim asks an elderly widower to be her escort.

Jim's pride in Gracie's new-found spelling-bee aptitude quickly turns to dismay when he has to drive her to tournaments all over the state.