Red Dwarf

The crew are dead, slain by their future selves in the cliff-hanger that ended series six. But coming back from the dead is a piece of cake compared to the real dilemma confronting Lister - the curry supplies have been destroyed and he's three million light years from the nearest poppadom. Unable to face cold turkey vindaloo style, he ignores causality and goes back in time intending to order "500 vindaloos to go" but winds up in Dallas, in November 1963, where he accidentally pushes a gunman out of a fifth floor window.

Rimmer's much more dashing alter ego, Ace Rimmer, arrives on Starbug terminally wounded. He asks Rimmer to take his place as the swashbuckling guardian of the Universe. Reluctantly Rimmer has to turn him down as he's too busy cataloguing his shoe collection.

When two realities converge, the Dwarfers undergo their most terrifying ordeal yet - they bump into a real, live, human woman who's attractive and nice. It's Lister's ex-girlfriend Kristine Kochanski. Kryten immediately goes into jealousy overload mode, convinced she'll steal Lister away from him, and starts plotting her immediate return to her own dimension.

When the generator and its back-up go down in the middle of the night, the crew have to crawl through the mile long labyrinth of service ducts to restart their engines. On their journey they discover a few surprising things about one another. Including what Lister once did on top of a crate of canned asparagus.

Lister finds himself missing Rimmer - until Kryten takes him on "The Rimmer Experience", a virtual reality ride featuring highlights of the departed crewmember's much-loathed life.

Kochanski takes the crew into the Artificial Reality suite and transports them to Pride and Prejudice World hoping to educate them in the subtleties of this literary masterpiece. Dream on.

A strange, intelligent virus has impregnated Lister. He tries to set up a communication link with the disease to sweet-talk it into not killing him, but when this doesn't work, he realises that he'll have to submit to Kochanski's disarmingly simple cure.

The crew searches for nanobots in a laundry hamper to restore Lister to his pre-viral state. What they find is the answer to who stole their spaceship, Red Dwarf, and why.